So all the new fall ad campaigns are storming Hollywood. I have noticed all the shoots are getting very very simple but here are some of my faves so far.

Stella Atois Beer above.

Buffalo Jeans (Love the stalkings) above

Hudson jeans (great ads)

And Guess ads below, which I love. Notice how everything seems to be going super retro?

In Hollywood, every girl who moves here from a small town/midwest/east coast who has blonde and big (real or fake) tits seems to "idolize" Marilyn Monroe. Even those brunettes and red heads (Megan Fox and her Marilyn tattoo or Lindsay Lohan and her Monroe quote tattoo) idolize Marilyn and her old Hollywood glamour. Here is the thing - that is totally fitting!

Every one seems to have this image in their head about how Marilyn Monroe was like this beautiful angel who was innocent and sweet. I mean, I am sure she was a nice girl but innocent and angelic she was not. She was a pill popping, drug doing, home wrecking actress with a nose job. I mean - she was just like the Lindsanity Lohans and Paris Hiltons. Scandal, issues, anything for attention and fame.

The only reason Marilyn Monroe keeps such a sweet image in so many people's minds is because there was A) NO INTERNET and B ) NO PAPARAZZI when she was alive. It was not the media machine and isntant upload camera phone, Twitter world we live in today where celebrities have to be stealthy as fuck to get away with anything.

The celebs now a days have publicists for THIS reason. There was not really publicists in the days of Monroe. They didn't have magazines by the buttloads and a gajillion blogs being updated minute by minute to worry about. Publicists of these days primary job is to keep secrets and scandals secret OR to make them known (depending on their celeb's image and agenda). Point is the skill of a ninja is required if celebs wanna smoke weed and not have every one on the planet know about it.

We did not even KNOW Marilyn smoked pot until this year when a home video randomly got realesed. She was obviously fucking the married President of the United States and with out all the media that we have now A) President Kennedy was not impeached and B) Marilyn kept a sweet sexy image with out much flack. Rumors spread but not at the gravity these rumors spread in this day and age with the investigative skills of those at TMZ.

Do you want to see the most diverse, fucking wierd, random eccelctic mix of people you have EVER seen within an hours time? I have been to raves, hippie parties, the hottest clubs in America, red carpet events, celebrity's private bday parties in their homes....I have NEVER seen the weirdest bunch of freaks ever as I have seen after spending literally just ONE HOUR in a Tmobile store. As I did not have my damn phone (that is why I was there) I had not a freakin thing to do while I waited but watch the people that filtered in and out of the Tmobile on Sunset Blvd next to Pinkberry. I am talking porn stars with lip injections and breast implants exploding out of their Ed Hardy T-shirts with their brand new phone switching to an even MORE brand new phone to the cutest little Jewish couple you have ever seen with their analog flip phone getting their pay as you go update. Those weren't even the most drastic contrasts I saw.

Ontop of that shit, one of the guys WORKING at Tmobile was talking about how on his PAID vacation he was going to Madrid then through Paris then traveling back up from there starting tomorrow. DUDE - I work with celebrities (who are great) and their fuckin representatives (who suck my balls) all god damn day long and I don't get paid vaca (anymore) and if I did, could still not afford a summer jaunt through Europe. I am thinking that A) Tmobile store is WAY more interesting than working with celebs and the people you encounter are PRiCEleSsssss and B) You get paid more (unless that asian was a trust fund baby...which in LA there are a LOT of...)....

Seirously considering Tmobile as future career path. That's right.

Today has been an honest typical Thursday for me thus far....and I am just reflecting on how awesome my typical day really is.

Woke up after hitting 2 hollywood bars and restaurants including Bar 210 and Trousdale. Woke up at 7:45 am to move car from meter spot to new spot (if you don't have parking at your apartment in Hollywood then consider yourself fucked like me). Rolled out of bed at 9:15 a.m. later. Made espresso turned on some 3OH!3, MSTRKRFT, La Roux and RHCP to wake to.

Got to work at 10am. I talked to one celebrity we are working with, got 2 thank you gifts from other celebrities in the mail...read about fifty celebrity gossip blogs (yes that is work), fiddled around on Facebook while making tons of new connections, talked to the managers of the newest hottest venue in Hollywood about how to get a celebrity in the club with out paparazzi seeing them, went shopping at vintage stored then to a BOMB Jewish deli for a total of a 2 hour lunch break, then talked to some people about summer pool party blow outs....then got a bbm asking if I wanted to hit the jacuzzi and drink and smoke in a friend's Mt. Olympus home...YES. YES I do. Sounds like THE perfect way to wrap up my day. Ohhhh yeahhhh.

M.I.A.'s "Born Free" video is causing quite the stir and has just been banned from YouTube. Click the link below to watch M.I.A.'s  "Born Free" video.

http://miauk.com/

M.I.A. is no stranger to political corruption, genocide, terroism, etc... essentially living in fear and in hiding her whole childhood because of racism, terroism and more. If any artist deserves to and should be doing a video like the one she did for "Born Free" it is M.I.A. She has seen a lot in her life and I really am proud of her for making statements like this. Bravo. YouTube - this is bullshit.

It portrays a "genocide" of what Eric Cartman would refer to as "Gingers".

People with red hair and freckles. It is extremely graphic but beautifully shot. It shows a non-race (people with red hair) being rounded up by American soldiers (notice the American flags on the uniforms) and rounded up, brutally beat, taken to a desert and blown to bits by the soldiers guns and bombs. What I was surprised by was how it really did force you to think about how this is really happening amongst tons of other races and creeds of people in societies all over the world. By making it the American soldiers and the people with red hair they some how drove this point home. I don't know what you would call it.

All I know is, yes it is super graphic, no I wouldn't want a young child watching it....but also THERE IS SO MUCH SEXUAL, SUPERFICIAL, RETARDED, REVOLTING SHIT ON YOUTUBE! I mean every where you turn on YouTube you are surrounded by stuff I wouldn't want a child watching. There are obviously parental controls (and if you are a parent you will be paying attention to your young child's internet usage ANYWAYS).

So why does YouTube insist on banning this video? Because it is graphic? Obviously not a real reason because YouTube is littered with graphic material. Why ban this of all things? It is graphic as hell but at least it has purpose, provokes thought and emotion and actually relates to real world issues and struggles that people NEED to be staring in the face.

Yes, let's just live in our little bubble where guys talking about dicks and ass while getting tasered in the balls is totally not graphic or disgusting and is FINE for YouTube. Or where there literally can be a video on YouTube titled "Ignorant Negro Receives Attitude Adjustment". How is it that YouTube bans M.I.A.'s "Born Free" vid yet it doesn't ban content that is blatently racist and sick (such as the "fine" content below)?

Hey YouTube how come half dressed 15 year old girls can dance infront of their web cam and post to YouTube and that is okay?..because all the pedophiles would never use YouTube to do what they do best - be sicko fucked up psycho pervy creepers....

BUT as soon as you put something up that is graphic but addresses the horrors of the real world...then all of a sudden SOMETHING MUST BE DONE. WTF YOUTUBE?!! WTF?!

Get on board the Semi Precious Weapons train bitches. Their music is great...but what is even better is seeing them at small shows when they aren't headlining for Lady Gaga's Monsters Ball tour. They are fucking amazing, greatful to fans, and the best god damn performers as far as any band I have seen in a LONG time.

Here's one of the many reasons why they are the SHIT. The SHIT I say - champagne on the audience...all the time.

I am not saying this to be pretentious or a braggart cuz I mean...I can't even say who the celebrities I worked with are. Let me just tell you some are literally icons all over the world and some of them are those women that have been named "sexiest woman in the universe" or whatever the fuck in those BS poles numerous times. Some were the action stars who's movies will be watched for generations to come because they were that ground breaking....and some were Emmy and Oscar winners (or both). Some were teen idols...those pop singers who 12 year old girls fantasize about (which is gross to even say but I fantasized at 12 years old...so fuck it). 

Anyways I spent a good amount of time being amidst conversations about weed, getting drunk with them and evading the worst scum in American media...the paparazzi. I have to say...if I was a celebrity I would be one of those Kanye West stories where I broke some assholes camera or ran them over in my car trying to get away. I don't think people understand: PAPARAZZI ARE THE BIGGEST ASSHOLES. THEY DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ANYONE BUT THEMSELVES. THEY ARE RUDE, INCONSIDERATE SPAWN OF SATAN. No joke, if I met the hottest man on the planet who was guaranteed to pleasure me all day, given me 10 orgasms per round, perform magic, take me around the world, dress me in silk and lace couture 24/7 and bathed me in champagne on the daily - AND HE WAS A PAP - I wouldn't give him the time of day. That is how much paparazzi suck dick. That is how little I trust and how far from the opposite I respect them. They cuss out everyone, talk shit to celebrities trying to get a rise out of them, and are hazardous in public situations. I know you are probably thinking I am overexagerating. Well, you work with some of the most famous and NICEST most genuine people on the planet and then try to go anywhere in public with them and tell me differently...I DARE YOU MOTHERFUCKER.

Still - I haven't met one celebrity I don't adore as a person and get along with wonderfully. SO suck it media.

My friend and I recently hit up Wonderland. It was convenient. I had friends there. Numerous reasons to go (and NOT because it had a good reputation NOR have I heard anything like "Oh it is so AWESOME". The Wonderland "Alice in wonderland" theme is super minimal. Cheaply done. Cute...but not capitalized on....which in my opinion is a failure. MILK THAT SHIT.

Anyways...some dude instantly walks up to us and is like "Come to out table". He drags us to the owners table. Points out his friends, who are the 2 owners, and then we grab our drink and hang out. Totally what I am used to. I have been at the owners table many a time at clubs all over Hollywood. They always are polite, respectful, and go about their merry way. Well the one douchebag owner (there are 2 owners, Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum) after 30 mins of us being there, starts leaning backwards into my girl. Like using her for a support beam because he is drunk and obviously coked the hell out. I say something about how he is leaning on her (it was super invasive and rude even for a club) and he starts freaking the hell out. Talking about how I need to leave, leave his table, we are in his way, WTF are we doing there. I thought he was kidding.

I have NEVER ever EVER been treated like he started to treat me that night. EVER. It was humiliating, shocking and unexpected. I work with some of the biggest stars and corporations in the WORLD and this guy doesn't even know who I am. Guess what? Mommy and daddy paid for your drug addiction, your benz and your private school, and now you used their money to invest in a club that will be done and over with before summer even comes. On top of that, the crowd there were some of the most homely club goers I have ever seen and that was BEFORE this owner treated us like shit. You can bet all my Twilight friends, Oscar winner friends and Grammy winning producers besties are going to know about what a shitty, terrible person the owner of the club was. And all those friends of mine will tell you that I am one of the easiest most down to earth people and they know that for me to be this upset with anyone is pretty abnormal....so they know I am not kidding when I say "YOU COULD NOT PAY ME TO GO TO THE SHITTY CLUB WONDERLAND. EVER. PERIOD." I also suggest you NEVER waste your time. Ladies, I can direct you to any and every club that is WAY better than that coke-hole. The end. Goodnight.

Their videos are so well done. Not bad. Not bad. Check out all these really cool teasers for their new album Plastic Island, plus video premier for "Stylo" with Bruce Willis.

Stylo premier:

Thinking about the Tigewhore Woods debacle gave me a flash back of a job I worked about 2 years ago. One of the celebrities I was working with during a 2 month long project, was a very very well known TV star and former male model. Gorgeous. I mean jaw droppingly sexy in every way...so obviously we ended up flirting here and there.

One night after work we sat at a table in a bar and drank tequila shot after tequila shot. He asked me if I was seeing anyone. I described my boiyfiend of the time (who had already checked out of the relationship) and how we had been together forever and I had grown up while he hadnt and we grew apart.

So this celebrity started telling me about his wife. He didn't seem excited about marriage at all no matter to whom he was married. I asked, "Well then why get married?" His response was, "She's a nice girl and I wanted to have kids. I don't want kids who are saying 'Where's mommy?' or 'Where's daddy?' so I need to be married for raising kids." It was just a pure "logic" based marriage in his mind. He then tried to sleep with me on a couple occassions which was flattering and incredibly tempting but wrong. I met his wife a couple times. This makes me think of Woods. His marriage seems like more of an image and logic thing. "Well I want kids, so I need to get married. Well I am 30 something. I need to get married now."

Ehh.